“Would you like another Chardonnay?” I asked. My regular’s glass was a quarter full. He doesn’t like to wait long between glasses. It was late afternoon and not very busy at The Pie Shoppe.
“By the time you pour that glass, I’ll be ready,” he said with a smirk. He comes in almost every day. Roly-poly, balding, and bespectacled, he always sets up a hardback book from the New York Times best-selling fiction list on a reading stand to peruse while he sips four glasses of Kendall Jackson Chardonnay. Today he had two books, one two-thirds open on the stand and one waiting near his pudgy elbow.
“That’s a lot of reading for one Pie Shoppe visit,” I said.
“Oh, I read very quickly. I’ll finish this one and be a quarter way into the other one before I leave.” Later, it turned out he wasn’t bragging in vain.
“Guess the Chardonnay helps.” I laughed.
With his third glass, he expects a slice of cornbread. “Center cut. Please make sure it’s very fresh.” If he’s really hungry, he’ll order the turkey dinner or pot roast to be enjoyed with the fourth glass. It was a hungry day, so he ordered the turkey, extra gravy on the side, melted cheese on his veggies. “And I’d like to order a top sirloin to go.”
“That’ll be a nice lunch tomorrow.”
“It’s not for me. It’s for my friend’s dog. I’m dog sitting for a few months.”
“Oh. Must be nice to be a guest in your house.”
He laughed. “She is man’s best friend. I don’t know what to feed her.”
“I’m sure a pet store would have something.”
“Yeah.” He didn’t sound convinced.
“How do you think she’d like her steak cooked?”
“I think she’d like it medium rare. How do you think?”
“Well, I like my steak rare. You know, still mooing. But I’m not a dog.”
His face scrunched at the idea. “Maybe medium’s better. Yes. Medium.”
“Okay. It comes with loaded mashed potatoes. Do you think she’d like that, or maybe just a plain baked potato?” Loaded mashed potatoes come with bacon, chopped green onions, sour cream, and cheddar cheese melted together on top.
“Hm. I’ll take the loaded mashed potatoes. What are the veggies?”
“They’re the same veggies you get. A medley of yellow and green squash, carrots, broccoli and onion. You want that for her.”
“I think maybe she wouldn’t like the broccoli.”
“I can order it without broccoli.”
“That’d be good.”
“Great. Thank you.” I rushed off to place his order.
As I gave him his fourth glass of Chardonnay, I said, “It’d be cheaper next time if you buy the whole bottle.” A bottle of wine is just under 5 glasses.
“Yeah.” He smiled. “But that would be so indulgent!”